I miss my turtles, even the racist one.

I used to have 2 of them. Calvin Klein and Perry Ellis. I was going to get a third - Ralph Lauren. But Calvin died so I changed my mind. And then I still had Perry (the racist one) for another year and a half before I released him into the wild (at a turtle pond I used to live nearby).

How do I know Perry was racist? Well, first of all, he was always a dick to me. So that covers all Asians. And he met a bunch of my white friends and snubbed them too. I think he met one Hispanic person and paid no mind to him. The only person he ever showed any love was one of my former pseudo-boyfriends, who’s black. Every time he came over, Perry would be clawing away at his tank wall trying to get to the Ex-Pseudo-BF. Then the Ex would take Perry out of his tank and let him climb up the Ex’s laptop case (it would be held up at one end to create a slope). They would continue to play together while I tried to win the Ex’s attention. But neither of them took notice of me.

Therefore, that’s how I know Perry was racist. 

BIG SIGH. Now I’m all alone. I want them back!